everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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