OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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