I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
