whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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