Me. At least after what I've been through.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
my poor anus
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
