You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
