But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize