Why are handjobs necessary in class?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize