Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize