K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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