.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
You took a bar mat shot.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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