In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
