We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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