i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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