if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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