Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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