so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Just high enough for therapy.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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