hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
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