I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
