my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Let's paint friendship bongs
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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