i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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