For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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