I think I just saw someone hide a body.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
