so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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