apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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