before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
