So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
