I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Randomize