Hey man sorry I got all grabby
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
