Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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