Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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