Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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