I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize