You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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