on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
