he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Randomize