I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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