dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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