i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Let's paint friendship bongs
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
