It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
