Dual....:-)
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
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So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
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no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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