Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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