After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize