Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.