how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
