I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize