If i come over, it means nothing
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
