He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
