I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I am midnight drunk by noon
My vagina just recognized that song.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
