I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize